Minding your Manners - Positive Affirmation and OCPD

We know to be polite to other people. When someone hands us a coffee, holds open a door, or shares a good tip. We say “thank you” almost so quickly that we don’t think about it. But anyone on the receiving end of a well placed “thank you” knows the impact those two little words can have.

So when was the last time you showed yourself that courtesy? I’m not saying its healthy or effective to mentally pat yourself on the back constantly. God knows that would breed a very self-congratulatory existence. But for people who tend to err on the side of perfectionism, we are much more likely to berate ourselves for the wrong than thank ourselves for the right.

Example. I am late to work and I get mad at myself, and start playing the “If only…” game. If only I laid out my shoes, if only the train was on time… etc. But when I am on time? Nothing. I don’t think of all those “if only” things that went right that day.

Maybe I should. If positive thoughts create a positive outlook, maybe my inner being could use some appreciation. Being polite can go within as well, because at its core, politeness is all about respect. In this case, respecting ourselves.


When the Concealer Comes Off - Honesty and OCPD

When  I was 14, I fell into some gravel. I wasn't badly hurt, but I did get a nasty scratch on my face. Going to school on Monday, I would have to answer all kinds of questions, and I was super self conscious about how it looked.

So I tried to cover it up. Concealers,  foundation, power- I tried it all. Then I tried to go to class.

Well, it didn't fool anybody. If anything, it looked worse! My mom pulled me aside

"You know, with all that concealer on it, it won't heal"

She was right. It needed to be in the open for the healing to being. Thinking about it, the human mind is the same way. Messy emotions or mental illness. By covering it up, we aren't fooling anyone. It hurts more, lasts longer, and may leave a scar.

Open wounds, mental or physical, are best left without any concealers on it. You may get some looks, some questions. But in the end, its the healing thats important. Because no one wants to be left scarred if they can help it!